By now you know there are many reasons why our friendships change once one of the connected units gets romantically involved. It usually
has nothing to do with the close bond that’s been formed over time, but
all to do with the new energy that has arrived in the life of our friend.
We are all aware that when love enters our world, it is totally
consuming. We can’t eat nor sleep, and what we seem to think about
most, is the person with whose love we have been injected. Of no fault
of our own – we change.
We always need friends
Because the person closest to us seems to have become closer to
someone else, does not mean we’ve lost our place in their heart. It
simply means we must give them time to remember there is enough
room for both of the relationships – one does not have to trump the other,
since they are different and fulfill different needs. Last week I wrote a
quote by William Rawlins, Stocker Professor of Interpersonal
Communication at Ohio University? He said friends will always need
“somebody to talk to, someone to depend on, and someone to enjoy.”
That will forever be. We need our friends and our friends need us.
When love selects someone in the friendship other than us, and a shift occurs, we take it personally. But once we come out of the realm of our emotions and honestly consider what it’s like for most when love pays a visit, it’s easier to be understanding and to allow our friend time. When things in their life settle, you will become reacquainted with them. Think about it. A friendship is a nonverbal contract, a decision both or all parties have made. We choose each other, and a friendship can be just as strong as a marriage. Because true friendships do last “until death do we part.”