Helping Relationships
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5 great ways to celebrate St. Valentine’s Day!


heart tree

I was walking away from my computer when it dawned on me, this Sunday is Valentines Day!  So I’ve decided not to write my actual blog post.  Instead I’m going to suggest five cool and easy ways to spend this Sunday, which happens to be Valentine’s Day.

  • Have brunch at Claire’s which is located at the Long Beach, CA Museum of Art.
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friends forever

By now you know there are many reasons why our friendships change once one of the connected units gets romantically involved.  It usually
has nothing to do with the close bond that’s been formed over time, but
all to do with the new energy that has arrived in the life of our friend.
We are all aware that when love enters our world, it is totally

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Romantic Relationships

John Lee’s six types of love

“Love is a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker” Anonymous

John Alan Lee is a 20th century Canadian psychologist who proposed the idea that there are six types of interpersonal love (three primaries and three secondaries). In his 1973 book entitled, The Colors of Love, Lee explains the six love types and assigns a color to each.

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Is There A Reason For The Change? Part II

best friends

Last week I wrote about how friendships shift, once marriage or a romantic relationship enters the equation.  I know you didn’t think things were going to remain the same forever, but you probably didn’t have a clue that things would be shaken up like this!  Even though your world is now different and the dust has settled, there are probably some aspects of your friendship that you would like to hold on to.  

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Blog The Coaching Kiva

Is There A Reason For The Change?

Love changes life images

Question:  Do you become a different person once in a romantic relationship?  If so – why?

While having dinner with a dear friend a few nights ago, I asked her what she would like to read about in my Coaching Kiva blog.  She said she is interested in people’s behaviors – why they do the things they do.  When I asked her to be more specific, she began telling me how she is experiencing feelings of abandonment since many of her friends have married. 

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Flip The Hourglass To A Brand New Start!

Thanksgiving was last Thursday and I can swear I’ve heard Caroling – already.  I know it’s all in my mind but I also know this year is rapidly coming to an end.  Wait – are those Jingle Bells I hear …?

There are only 28 days left in this year!   We’ve got so much to do in such a short amount of time. 

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Relationship Coach or Therapist – Which One Will Benefit You?


Is your relationship good, but you’d like to make it better?  Has your lover become your roommate? – Or is your relationship in trouble and needs help saving?

If you’ve found yourself asking any of these questions you know you need help, but you may not be certain if you require a relationship coach or a relationship therapist?  Let me help you decipher the two. 

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Appreciation Or Expectation: Which One Compliments Your Relationship?

appreciation or expectation relationships

So you’re five months into a new relationship and the person couldn’t be a better fit for you. The stimulating conversations excite and motivate, the laughter brings much welcomed joy, and the sex – the sex – couldn’t have come at a better time! It’s been a while since you’ve felt like this about someone. You had begun to wonder if love had just passed you by. Yet, to your surprise love has arrived, and now your current mantra is full of phrases thanking the Universe for such a perfect connection. You appreciate this person; Life is good!

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About The Coaching Kiva

Do you find it painful to try to get your point across when talking with your partner?  Are you suspicious – worried that he, or she may be unfaithful?  Does it make you feel insecure that “the thrill is gone” from your relationship, and you have no idea how to bring it back?

Hi, I’m Lateefah Wielenga, Ph.D., the CEO of The Coaching Kiva. 

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The Coaching Kiva



get the girl script

Well, maybe not tonight but certainly sometime really soon!

Hi, my name is Dr. Lateefah Wielenga, founder of The Coaching Kiva (formerly The Coaching Kitchen) and I am a Co-Creator. I help men create wonderful, lasting relationships with beautiful, interesting, loving women.

I know many of you guys have been stumped when it comes to approaching that beautiful, sexy women you’ve had your eye on – or that has been standing right in front of you. You’ve probably thought “Man she’s hot. I’d really like to talk to her.” But for some reason you just didn’t follow through. You didn’t go up to her and start a conversation – you didn’t ask her name – you never even asked for her number.

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