You’ve got to become proactive in your children’s lives, in terms of aligning with whom, and where they are in their lives NOW! Considering what you know about teens using drugs, alcohol – the suicide rate, and now social media addiction – there’s no room for guilt, shame or, blame. Now is the time for your presence, for your patience, and for your support.
I know you’re really busy providing for your family, taking care of the kids at home, or both. Yet, you’ve got to find the time to spend as a family. It can be a struggle, but it’s imperative you carve out the time to engage with your kids, be a stealthy observer, and let them know you’re listening. I know they’re your priority, but sometimes they’re not so sure.
Couples, and single parents who exhibit stable, healthy relationships are usually the parents who – when finding time for ‘family-time’ – tend to enjoy the hours shared as a cohesive unit. When parents are engaged in healthy, loving relationships, and when single parents are happy and healthy in their lives, you’re modeling happiness and emotional health. Spending time with your kids helps to maintain the trust created when they were infants. Your children must trust you if they’re going to discuss serious issues with you, such as drugs, alcohol, sexual questions, and problems in their social lives.
You may be inclined to believe your child would never participate in activities such as using drugs, or alcohol. You may not want to consider your child being so unhappy they’ve considered suicide. Now is the time to Wake-up! Consider all of what you don’t want to consider about your child a possibility – for their sake. However, having open, honest conversations with your children, while listening attentively without judgment or ridicule, is one of the ways that leads to discovery and support for your child.
This happens easiest when you and your child are involved in a, loving, healthy relationship. Research shows that modeling a healthy marriage, or lifestyle for your children can also help them avoid negative life experiences. Children whose parents are in a healthy marriage, or single parents experiencing healthy lifestyles are:
- Less likely to attempt or commit suicide
- Less likely to abuse drugs or alcohol
- Less likely to be a victim of physical or sexual abuse
- Less likely to cause or experience teen pregnancy
If you find you’re having the slightest difficulty in your marriage or in your life, seek professional guidance now. Call The Coaching Kiva (562) 895-0516
Lateefah Wielenga, PhD